So I’ve been toying with the idea of taking Adrian back to Disney World for a couple of months now. It’s been 5 years since we took him last. That last was the trip where Adrian reached out and pinched a stranger because he was unhappy waiting for a meal. I came back from that trip black and blue, beaten down, sad with the realization that we might not be able to bring him back. His behavior was so out of control he was a danger to himself and everyone around him.
Of course the same was true at home at that time too. But taking the whole nightmare on the road (or plane) just wasn’t a good plan.
Recently I’ve traveled with Adrian to his favorite malls, gone with him to restaurants and had peaceful home visits. It’s convinced me that it might be feasible to take Adrian back to his favorite vacation destination. But I’m not taking any chances. If we go, I want it to be a success we can build on for years to come.
So my planning starts with a novel idea. We’re only going to take Adrian, not the rest of the family. A good portion of why our visits have been so good is that, for the short time I’m with Adrian, I can focus completely on him. The worst experiences we’ve had at Disney World with Adrian have all been linked, in one way or another, to our efforts to accommodate others. We had 3 other kids who wanted to go on rides and do things Adrian didn’t want to do. We tried to make everyone happy. Sometimes Adrian did ok with that. Sometimes it ended horribly for everyone.
At this point our other kids have had their chance to go to Disney World without Adrian. It’s his turn to get the trip he wants and needs. So this trip we will only ride the rides Adrian wants to go on. We will take breaks when Adrian needs them. We will eat when and where it works best for Adrian. It’s all going to be for him.
I still hope that someday family vacations to Disney with Adrian will be possible… but we have to survive this one first!