So this past week was rough. It started out ok. We were seeing more aggressive behaviors and much less calm from Monday on. We know he ate part of a wall at one point and I discovered that a pizza dough I made used an illegal parmesan cheese. He’d eaten that on Sunday and Monday.
So ok, we fix that and we’re good. Right?
We never quite got back to that good spot again the entire week. We did ok but it wasn’t the same. While he was coming down from tantrums faster than before the diet, we were still having tantrums all the sudden when we hadn’t had any for weeks.
Then Saturday and Sunday came. And it was awful. Right back to as if we never started the diet. WHY?
We just don’t know. We keep things Adrian can’t have locked up in a footlocker. We did find that wide open on Saturday at around 11 am. But despite the fact Adrian must have been in that room, we can’t see what, if anything, he took. There were muffins, candy, chocolate chips, rolls and cereal all there, seemingly undisturbed.
The only thing he could have taken that wouldn’t have been obvious was granola and cereal bars that were all thrown in a plastic grocery bag. But then there would have been wrappers and we didn’t see any. Granted, I didn’t go searching through the garbage. I wish now I had.
Saturday was bad. Sunday was worse. Today the school had the worst episode they’ve seen since the start of the school year. He came home with his shirt all ripped up from a rage – Hulk Hogan style. He’s been crazy here since he got off the school bus two hours ago. And all of that was with using all the meds.
The worst part of it all is I just don’t understand why. What’s different? Is it something he consumed? If so, what? Could it be he got to something in that box and it’s just taking longer than the usual 24 hours to go through his system? Could it be the dried pineapple that I was so happy he finally ate on Saturday and Sunday? Is it something else in his diet that I messed up with? Is it something he was eating before that he’s reacting to now? Does it have nothing to do with food at all?!
At this point you could tell me it’s nothing more than the phase of the moon and I’d be happy. I just want to know WHY.
The return of these behavior problems brings back all the old familiar stress. I can feel it in my back and in my shoulders. I’m listening to him carefully, trying my best to catch him before he goes over the cliff into total lack of control, waiting for the smash of a window, the banging on the wall, the yelp of a poor sibling who happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, another broken appliance, another hole to fix, …
I’m sitting here with duct tape now, repairing the computer headphones he broke in a tantrum. I’m covering every last inch with duct tape. It’s the only way we can make them last. Then I’ll duct tape a new set of ear buds for his music player because after months of abuse, he finally broke the last duct taped pair.
And I can’t help but wish that duct tape could fix all of this too.